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Rate the Last Movie You Saw

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19 hours ago, WestRider said:

It comes!
Not from the grave!
But from beyond!

It amuses me that Lovecraft probably would have found the 1986 adaptation far more horrifying than his original story, given that it added in a bunch of psycho-sexual stuff, which he had issues with at the best of times XD

I need to rewatch that.  Haven't seen it 30 years.

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Between Two Ferns: the Movie 8/10
I am not a huge Zack Gallifaknickknackpaddywhack but this movie had me laughing all the way through.  The guests stars are truly hilarious.  The sequence with Peter Dinklage is worth it alone.  Dinklage once again proves that he is a god among us mere mortals.

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Seed: Kind of surprised that a movie that generated so much controversy ended up being so boring.

Cowboys and Aliens: Finally got around to seeing this. Now I'm even more bummed that I missed it in the theatre. It was a risky move, and they don't always manage to mesh the Western and SF Horror elements successfully*, but it was still a whole lot of fun.

*Also, it's really hard for me to buy Harrison Ford as a bad guy. Even when he's got all the elements in place, it just doesn't work.

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Maleficent: Mistress of Evil

 2/5

This film is everywhere in terms of what's not very good about it.

Without specifics, Villians are remarkably close to actual nazi germany. If you find what the nazis did to be horrifying, this film probably not for you. Probably not for your kids, either. Especially if gas chambers are trigger for you. They definitely went a bit too evil on this one in terms of underlying themes.

There's a big battle scene that really doesn't make any sense, tactically speaking. Not exactly unusual for this sort of film, but it's annoying all the same. If anyone saw, "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe," the big battle is of similar quality. 

And the plot centers around a prequel romance that really isn't explored or shown.

No humor.

And then, somehow, they have a happy ending which really feels out of place.

Not really a kids film. Feels like an R rated film that's been edited to be PG rated. There's just no real kids component to this one.

 

Costumes are pretty good. CGI looks good. Nothing wrong with the acting itself. And the plot is easy enough to follow. They did do a good job making all female lead characters into a film that's not about why you should hate/love males (as is often hollywood's failure), so definitely praise deserved there. They also did a good job avoiding talking about religion.

 

Though regarding costumes and acting, the element "iron" is pretty central to the plot and, yet, seems like Iron is portrayed as a weightless material in this film. Iron, apparently, doesn't rust either. Another not unusual thing for this sort of film, but annoying all the same.

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Sharktopus: Close to a perfect low budget cheesy monster flick. The only real flaw is that they had the perfect opportunity for a "I am your creator! You must obey me!" moment and they didn't take it.

Grabbers: Another fun one. Blood-sucking aliens land on an isolated Irish island. No one has any real weapons, and the aliens are incredibly resilient anyhow. Their one real weakness? Feeding from anyone with a sufficiently high blood alcohol level is toxic to them XD

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The Omen II: I felt like this one actually held up better than the first one. Better technology, I guess, plus Lance Henrikson always makes everything better.

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark: Guillermo del Toro was involved with it, so you know it's going to be gorgeous and atmospheric. Some very solid acting and pretty good jump scares, too, altho the CGI has aged kind of poorly, and I really disliked the ending.

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Forbidden Planet: I didn't actually enjoy it hugely as a film, but it's a great one for historical perspective. The influence on Star Trek alone was immense. Honestly, this feels more like most of the stereotypical depictions of Star Trek than any actual episode of Star Trek that I've seen.

Also, Leslie Nielsen before his hair went white. That kept weirding me out the whole time.

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1 hour ago, WestRider said:

Forbidden Planet: I didn't actually enjoy it hugely as a film, but it's a great one for historical perspective. The influence on Star Trek alone was immense. Honestly, this feels more like most of the stereotypical depictions of Star Trek than any actual episode of Star Trek that I've seen.

Also, Leslie Nielsen before his hair went white. That kept weirding me out the whole time.

It is definitely better if you have studied Shakespeare.

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15 hours ago, Yarbicus said:

It is definitely better if you have studied Shakespeare.

I'm familiar with The Tempest, I got that part. It was more just that all the Space Patrol (or whatever their organization was) guys seemed pretty much like jerks. I kept thinking how much better it would have been as an original series Star Trek thing.

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8 minutes ago, WestRider said:

I'm familiar with The Tempest, I got that part. It was more just that all the Space Patrol (or whatever their organization was) guys seemed pretty much like jerks. I kept thinking how much better it would have been as an original series Star Trek thing.

Forbidden Planet was also made in the early-to-mid-Fifties (written in `52, filmed in `55). Many of the cast and crew were veterans of WWII and/or Korean War, so the casual-but-still-military attitude of much of the men probably owed as much to the behavior of the shipwrecked sailors in The Tempest as it does with real-world Navy crews in the Pacific Theater. The enlisted guys do a lot of grumbling and grousing, but pretty much hop to whenever the NCOs give them the stink eye. The officers are fairly casual with each other and can be freindly with the enlisted men, but its clear that's a one-way street, all of the enlisted men are always quite formal when talking to the officers. Well, until the giant id monster shows up and they start to panic.

The officers and enlisted aboard the United Planets Cruiser C-57D are also kinda sexist horndogs towards Altaira... But, c'mon, it was a long space-flight and it's Anne Francis in a miniskirt. They're only human!

There was talk about a decade back of J. Michael Straczynski writing a script for a remake. Seems to have vanished into Development Limbo. But, man, imagine how awesome that would be?

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Yeah, it was clearly a case of being a product of its time. It's not something inherently bad in the film, and I understand why it ended up like that. I just didn't, personally, enjoy watching it because of that.

Straczynski said somewhere that it had fallen apart, and wasn't in progress as far as he knew. Unfortunate, I think he could have done amazing things with a remake.

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The Rocketeer was a favorite of mine as a kid, but I don’t think I’ve rewatched in in a least 20 years. Gave it a re-watch last night and it’s still great.

Okay, sure, Billy Campbell is a bit wooden (Brendan Fraser, Brandon Routh, and Nathan Fillion are so much better at playing this sort of Square-Jawed, All-American Hero) but he’s not terrible. He’s mostly just upstaged by Alan Akron, Jennifer Connelly, and Paul Sorvino stealing the show... and Timothy Dalton is clearly relishing every bite of the set, gleefully scenery chewing his way through the whole film. Since he basically gets to play an Errol Flynn type swashbuckler, a dashing debonair romantic lead, and a Bond Villain simultaneously, you can’t help but enjoy watching him enjoy the part.

Special effects are, well, they’re thirty years old. The flying scenes are quite as seamless as I remember, which might rob the movie of some of its magic... But everything else holds up great.

Rumors of a sequel or remake have swirled around forever, but I don’t think it will ever happen.

If you’ve never seen The Rocketeer or just haven’t seen it this century, give it a whirl.

Four stars.

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2 hours ago, Ish said:

If you’ve never seen The Rocketeer or just haven’t seen it this century, give it a whirl.

Thanks for reminding me of this one. I remember it being a lot of fun. Def gonna give it a rewatch at some point here now.

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My dad took me to The Shining when I was 13 and it really got to me. After watching Doctor Sleep, it looks like the Outlook Hotel will feature in my nightmares again! The movie was really well done. I'm not a huge horror fan but I love King's books. So nice to see them turned into decent movies finally.

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The Omen 3: Hit and miss. Damien's monologues in particular just don't end up working out. I'm pretty sure it's a combination of script and direction, because I know Sam Neill can do better than that. The overall plot works out pretty well tho, and there are some great bits here and there. It'll never be a classic the way the original was, but it's far better than most cases of sequel-itis.

Leprechaun: Origin: Only nominally related to the Warwick Kinrade franchise. Apparently it got kinda panned, but I'm guessing that it's one of those cases where it's not "original" or "groundbreaking" enough for the critics. In and of itself, it seemed pretty solid to me. Stephanie Bennett seems like she could actually make a pretty good action hera if someone gave her the right roles.

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12 hours ago, WestRider said:

The Tunnel (2011): Basically an indie found footage remake of C.H.U.D. It's solid. Not terrible, not great. I would be interested to see what the director can do with a proper budget, because there's definitely promise here.

I'm waiting for the Portland homeless problem to become a CHUD problem. 

Peace in our time.

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Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace

Script 1/5

Plot 2/5

Graphics 4/5

Acting 2.5/5

Score 4/5

We are introduced to a Galaxy Spanning United Nations utilizing Advanced Technology and Science to enforce the will of some members onto others in the name of peace. This, while allowing black market operations to exist within the capital of said Galaxy wide organization, allowing a healthy slave trade to exist, and promoting negative realworld stereotypes.  Action scenes are well choreographed, for the most part.  The soundtrack is probably the best aspect of this movie.  None of the acting gets by unscathed, even from veterans. 

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4 hours ago, Ish said:

Music 10/5 

Say what you will about the Star Wars franchise (even the most devout Fandalorian has to concede they’re of variable quality) but there’s no denying that John Williams’ scores are outstanding.

I remember when I finally watched Revenge of the Sith, I kept feeling serious dissonance, because the music was evoking so much emotion, and everything else in the film was falling so flat.

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The weird thing about Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith, at least for me, is the knowledge that Francis Ford Coppola is officially acknowledged as having done some rewrites on the script... Francis Motherloving Ford Goddamn Coppola.

How bad must the original scripts have been if Coppola is your script doctor and we still get the “I don’t like sand” soliloquy as the big romance moment and “Not the younglings!” as the big tragic moment? 

I mean, it’s Star Wars, so I wasn’t expecting Dostoevsky. I was expecting space-wizards and laserswords, cornball jokes, and cliché villains who call themselves “the Dark Side.” The franchise is supposed to be a recreation of the pulp serials of the Golden Age of Hollywood... But, yikes.
 

I wanted Edgar Rice Burrows, not Ed Wood.

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