Jump to content

Twas the Night Before Christmas...Warhammer style!

Lord Hanaur

Recommended Posts

Twas the Day after Christmas and all the through the Sector
not a tombship was stirring, none on attack vectors,
The stations all manned by men with blank stares
In hopes that the Nemesor soon would be there.
The soldiers were all nestled all snug in their bunks
While Cro-hypersleep kept sane the warrior monks
Mothership in her dry dock, and I and the 'Cap
Had frozen our brains for a long Warping nap
when out on the flight deck arose such a clamor
battle claxon going and the servitors-a-chatter
I sprang from my cryotube to see what's the matter.
Seen On the scanner, I knew like a flash
Hit the red button, our sleep couldn't last
The moon on the heads up scanners were slow
Giving us data of many large objects below
When on what, to my surprise, did scanners focus in?
But a miniature sleigh with eight tiny Wolfkin
With an imposing armed driver among the stars
I knew in a moment he must be Grimnar
More rapid than Falchions, his coursers they came
and he whistled and shouted and called them by name
"Now Smasher! now Crasher! Now Fang and Vixen!
On, Comet! on, Ripper! on Thunder and Blitzer!
Put the enemy to torch! Pike their heads on the wall!
Now pad away! Pad away! Pad away all!"
Like Vindettas as they take to the sky
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky;
so up to the ship the coursers they lept
with the sleigh full of weapons Logan Grimnar kept
And then, in a blinking, I heard but not saw
Growling and pawing of each little wolf paw
As I cleared my slow head and was turning around
At my gunners throat came Wolfkin in singular bounds
Logan dressed in furs, from his head to his heels
His armor now all tarnished with his recent kills
A bundle of swords he had flung on his back
and he looked like a pedler of death come to sack
His eyes-how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a sneer
And the souls of my men were filled with true fear
The stump of my gunner he held in his teeth,
and the blood it covered his armor like a sheath
He had a broad axe and a rotund round belly
that shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly
He was chubby and plump, a right menacing old man
I laughed not when I saw what he'd done to poor Stan
a wink of his eye, twisting off poor Stan's head
soon gave me to know I had everything to dread
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work.
Decapitating bridge crew, then turned with a jerk
And laying a finger along his nose,
And giving a nod, out the airlock he goes;
He sprang to his sleigh, to his beasts gave the order
and away all they bounded, the gruesome work sorted.
But I heard him exclaim from behind my hiding place
"Come again to Fenris and I'll rip off your face!"
-Josef McCoy

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Create New...