I don't think playing with like-minded individuals equals only playing those you know. It just means you have to communicate with your opponent before the game starts, or even during the game ("I know you can just keep moving back and shooting at me, but I am not really feeling very engaged in this game right now because of it.") I know wargamers, as a group, are not great about expressing themselves in person; so that is a hurdle, but one that can be overtaken.
And Pax, I think an event at Guardian where they gave out no prizes, but ordered pizza and everybody got a few drink tickets would be amazing, but I think it would hurt their bottom line (since most people would spend less overall in that scheme).
I prefer a complete fusion and balance of the two. Example: I have an idea for a model/unit ( I want AdMech Thallax with my Heresy Marines), then think of rules that could apply that would also be effective (Hmmm, Broadsides are good), then modify the models to make them better fit the rules (missle fists on you, Thallax!).
The thing is, from a visual and coolness factor, there are conversions; you can make a model look any way you want. There is no equivalent to this for rules.