Ish

I’m an Anglophile, not a Teutonophile. The city of Rome was “sacked by barbarians” seven times in its history. But it’s tricky to refer to the people who did the sacking as “Germans, French, Italians, and Bulgarians” as those countries didn’t exist and the people doing the sacking wouldn’t have identified themselves as such. In 390 BCE by the Senone Gauls, who lived in the region that roughly corresponds to the modern French-Italian border; In 410 CE by the Visigoths, in 455 CE by the Vandals, in 546 CE and 550 CE by the Ostrogoths; all peoples who originated in Central Asia, who moved into Central Europe, but traveled extensively and spread throughout the continent; In 1084 CE by the Normans, under Robert Guiscard Duke of Apulia and Calabria, which is basically the “toe” and the “heel” of modern Italy’s “boot;” And lastly in 1527 by mercenaries serving Charles V, Holy Roman Emperor. You can kinda think of the Visigoths, Ostrogoths, and Vandals as distant ancestors of the modern Germans... But that’s pretty tenuous, plus they’re so far back in history that, really, they’re sort of the ancestors of everyone in Europe. Guiscard’s Normans originated in what is now France (specifically Normandy), but of course the Norman came from Scandinavia originally (Norman = North Man)... and they all lived in what is no modern Italy and Scilly. Charles V ruled the Holy Roman Empire at more or less it’s apex, covering pretty much the entirety of the European continent. Only the British isles, Scandinavia, Russia, and the Balkans weren’t part of it... and he had some minor territorial holdings in most of those regions too. It wouldn’t be until the Treaty of Westphalia (1648 CE) when Europe would really coalesce into the modern nation-states we have today. In fact, most historians will argue that the idea of a nation-state – where the people identify more strongly with a national government than ethnotribal affiliation – was essentially created by the Treaty of Westphalia... and it would still be several centuries before Italy, Germany, and France would all “unify” into Italy, Germany, and France.

Toilet paper isn’t actually in short supply, even if store shelves are temporary empty, there’s still warehouses full of the stuff and no reason that Charmin, et. al., cannot make more. We should just chill. But people won’t chill. Stocking up on toilet paper is a relatively cheap action, both in terms of monetary cost and opportunity cost. People like to think that they are “doing something” when they feel at risk. The panic over toilet paper isn’t a real reflection of toilet paper supply. If you have enough supply on hand already to get through the next week or two, you’ll be fine. There will be more on the shelves soon.The toilet paper panic started in Australia, back in December/January, when China first began to shut down its exports. Australia gets the vast majority of its paper products from China, so when China started to cut off the paper supply, Australians started to stock up on essentials. Americans get the majority of our paper products from the Pacific Northwest and western Canada. We’re not going to run out. Chicken is cheap, especially in bulk. So if $20 will buy you two pounds of steak, four pounds of ground chuck, or ten pounds of boneless skinless chicken thighs, people feel like they are “doing something” by buying the bigger quantity. Of course, since the U.S. is a net exporter of food and with the exception of some specialty items, like wines and cheeses, we get all of our staples domestically... We ain’t gonna run out of food. Disaster preparedness experts call this “zero risk bias,” in which people prefer to try to eliminate one type of possibly superficial risk entirely rather than do something that would reduce their total risk by a greater amount. It’s why people stock up on toilet paper, bottled water, and cans of soup... But never buy a basic first aid kit. There’s an old joke amongst preppers that basically boils down to one guy in his apocalypse bunker with ten million cans of beans and no can opener.

Slightly clearly image with Ghazghkull’s rules. He’s been juicing.

I wonder how broad of a net they’ll cast for the time period covered by Age of Hannibal. Obviously, with the man’s name in the title, they’re going to have to cover the man’s most famous exploits during the Second Punic War (218-201 BCE) and might push it a bit to cover his earlier conquest of Hispania (c. 220 BCE) or the later Seleucid War (192–188 BCE)... But I’d really love to be able to collect a force representing Yehudah ha-Makabi (a.k.a. Judah Maccabee) and the Maccabean Revolt (167–160 BCE). Because Hanukkah deserves a war game, dagnabbit.

Puppetswar.eu used to sell “Mantis Heads,” but I can’t find them on their website now. Might be worth dropping them an e-mail...

Oh... I see that now. Nevermind.

In my experience, the best way to grow an audience for a game is to play it.

You might want to drill some holes into the eyes of the Froglickers’ magic tiki masks.

I’ll be bringing Marvel Crisis Protocol with me again, if anyone wants to get a demonstration game.

The ancient Roman public religion had a minor deity, Fascinus, who represented good health, good fortune, and protection. Effigies and amulets of him were used to invoke his divine protection from sickness and bad luck. Specifically, sicknesses and bad luck caused by the Evil Eye. (The Evil Eye also had a sort of hypnotic mind control power which was known as “fascination,” which is the root of that word in English.) The most common depiction was a simple erect phallus worn as a charm on simple cord around the neck, popular with Roman soldiers and newborn babies. When a Roman general was paraded through Rome in triumph, the Vestal Virgins would mount a effigy of an erect phallus (often with wings) to the underside of the chariot to protect him from witches. (Yep, modern ‘Mericuh! truck nuts are actual a two millennia old pagan religious tradition.) But by far my favorite depiction of Fascinus was as a giant erect phallus, with eagle wings and lion’s paws, with a phallus of its own AND a phallus for a tail. (Yep, the internet Dickbutt meme was around more than two-thousand years before the internet.) This Fascinus phallus-griffon thing was often depicted ejaculating onto (or into) an eye with a scorpion on it (representing the evil eye). So, what’s the lesson in all this fascinating nonsense? Well, as our modern world is currently being consumed by sickness and bad luck, I think we should all unite together and give a flying [big bad swear word].

Please do not just go straight to your doctor's office, emergency room, or an urgent care facility for COVID-19 / Orthocoronavirinae / Corona Virus testing unless your doctor has referred you for testing. COVID-19 tests are in limited supply and only available by a doctor’s order for high-risk patients who meet specific criteria. If you are concerned that you or a family member are exhibiting symptoms of COVID-19, please contact your doctor or your health care provider by phone first before coming in. The last thing we want to do is overwhelm the healthcare system with unnecessary tests or panicky crowds. Not only will it make it harder to care for anyone who actually has become infected with Orthocoronavirinae, it will also make it more difficult to care for people suffering from everyday ailments like influenza, asthma, injuries, child birth, etc. Take care of yourselves, take care of your families, and do everything you can to flatten the curve. Don't let the forces of Nurgle win!

The only books that are truly essential are the core rulebook, which is available as stand-alone book or in the Underhive or Dark Uprising boxed sets. The boxed set rules have all the rules to play, but only have two gangs (Escher and Goliath in Underhive; Corpse Grinders and Enforcers in Dark Uprising). Rules for all six of the “main” gangs are found in Gangs of the Underhive. Rules for Chaos Cultist Gangs and Genestealer Cultist Gangs are free PDFs on GW’s website. If you’re interested in one of the gangs in the starter sets, that’s probably the most cost effective way to buy. Even better if you can find someone to split the contents with.

That shouldn't impact the game, much, at the standard level of tournament play. But it will make it easier to play lower points value games and still include some of the "toys" that are normally part of the core.

I thought it looked a little fishy.

What about an upright bass? I’m not very good, yet, but I’ve been practicing by playing scale.

My Sorylians have been in dry dock way too long.

How hard can you kick?

There are going to be sooo many chess with death jokes, memes, and comics in the next few days.

Very few men could pull off a career that included The Seventh Seal, Flash Gordon, Rush Hour 3, and The Greatest Story Ever Told. He’s played Jesus and Ming the Merciless. He’s played chess with Death and matched wits with James Bond. He’s cast out demons and force choked a Jedi. “Legend” is an overused word these days, but I can think of few better ways to describe him.